Welcome to Carnal Knowledge

I am Dr. Janell Carroll – a sexologist, author, and college professor.  I’m really happy you’re visiting this site. If it’s your first time – thanks for stopping by.  If you’ve been here before – welcome back.  Over the past few years I’ve been really busy exploring sex around the world – traveling to far away places to learn how people think about and have sex.  I have found that culture has an enormous effect on how sexuality is expressed.  I’m going to talk about culture and sexuality and even share some interesting videos and photos with you here, so keep posted. If you take a second and explore some of my blog posts, you’ll also notice that I do lots of public speaking.  I am available to speak about my international research and I’d love to come to your University or organization (for more information contact us at info@drjanellcarroll).  Last year I got to visit a ton of great schools in Iowa, California, Ohio, Florida, Kentucky, New York, Connecticut, Pennsylvania, and Missouri.

You’ll notice that in the blogs below I’ve explored a variety of issues related to sexuality.  I’ll blog about anything related to sex because I love to talk about it. Make sure you subscribe by checking the box below.  That way, you’ll know when I’ve added new info and can be the first to check it out.  I would also love to hear from you.  If you’ve got something to say, questions, or comments, please send ‘em in (info@drjanellcarroll.com).  I’d love to hear what you’re thinking.

You’ll also notice to the right of the banner above is a feature called SEXBYTE.  Here I’ll give you a little snippet of actual sex research, along with the reference so you’ll know where to go if you want more information.   You’ll also find my Tweets (to the right under “What Am I Doing?”) and if you want to follow me on Twitter just go to www.twitter.com and find me (DrJanellCarroll) You’ll also see some of my favorite photos on the FlickR link (just below the Twitter box).

The goal is to keep this hip and fun.  After all, sex IS fun, right?  Come back soon.

Western Connecticut State U Rocks!!!

I traveled to Western Connecticut State University yesterday to talk about my research on cross-cultural sexuality.  It was a great trip.  The students were very responsive, asked great questions, and really were able to understand the reasons why it’s so important to think about how culture and society affects the views and attitudes about sexuality.  We could have talked all day!  A huge thanks to Adrienne who organized the event and brought me on campus to speak.  We took some fun pictures, so I’ll be posting more pictures here soon (check out the Flickr icon below as well).

Thanks to all the students who stopped by to listen yesterday – good luck finishing up your finals!

For Better: The Science of a Good Marriage

I have recently come across this book by Tara Parker-pope, author of the New York Times‘s Well blog.  I’ve always liked her stuff in the New York Times, so I thought I’d give this book a try.  I was a little surprised to learn that one of the reasons she wrote the book was to explore some of the reasons why she thought her own marriage had recently ended in divorce.  But I did really appreciate her candor and approach to this subject.  This is a great book, chock full of current and fascinating research on why a marriage succeeds.  She explores areas such as monogamy, love, sex, children, money, and housework—and provides lots of good, practical advice.

I think this is a book everyone should read – especially those who are contemplating marriage.  It is so important to know this stuff prior to the “I Do.”  To find out more about the book, click here

WCSU Photos

Fly on the Wall

I always get kind of sad this time of year.  It’s finals time, which means classes are over! But I’m not ready!  I have so much more to say and we have so many more topics to discuss! Although I’m always thankful to have students take a human sexuality course, I REALLY wish we could have sex I and sex II courses.  What if there were an ADVANCED human sexuality course?  Well, it’s not going to happen. Unfortunately there is never enough time to talk about everything we need to talk about!

Since classes are officially over, I’ll have more time to blog and answer your questions, so keep ‘em coming. I’d also like to really explore what’s on the minds of today’s high school and college students.  What do they say they wish their parents talked about?  What do they want to know more about?  What are the challenges they face when it comes to sexuality and relationships?  And are they confused about changing sexual practices, such as sexting, hooking up, friends with benefits, or cyber communication?  What’s happening in the sex lives of teens and young adults today?  I’m going to be a “fly on the wall” so make sure you stay posted!

I Kissed A Girl (Stingray).

I just returned home after a relaxing vacation in the sun.  In this photo, I’m kissing a female stingray – and I was scared to death!  There were so many stingrays under the sand beneath our feet and I had no idea if I was going to step on one.  The islanders believe kissing a stingray brings good luck – let’s hope so!

I have never been good at relaxation but I do think it’s good for us to slow down and take time out of our busy schedules to relax.  It gives us a chance to focus on what’s really important in life.  I have had so many things floating around in my head lately, it’s good to get a clear focus and renewed energy!

On this blog I’m going to continue answering your questions about sexuality, but I’m also going to catch you up on some great research being done in this area.  If you have any questions or ideas about content, please shoot me an email and let me know!  I’ll look forward to hearing from you.  In the meantime, stay posted for a new blog in the next day or so.  I’ve got to get the sand out of my toes first (smile).

Dr. Carroll’s Sex Advice #3

Hey, it’s Monday again – and you know what that means!  Time for another blog.  I have another interesting question and response below.  Remember to keep sending your questions about sex.  Ask away!

Dear Dr. Carroll: You said that the female orgasm is the result of direct or indirect clitoral stimulation.  However, my girlfriend claims to be able to have three distinct types of orgasms – clitoral, vaginal, and anal. What’s up with that?

Answer: All women say their orgasms feel differently at different times.  Different stimulation, moods, emotions, and even time of month can influence how an orgasm feels. Some women tell me their orgasms during masturbation feel better than their sex orgasms, while others tell me they like their sex orgasms better.  The bottom line is that the majority of orgasms are triggered by direct or indirect clitoral pressure – so regardless of the actual sexual behavior they are engaging in, an orgasm can “feel” different even though it’s caused by the same thing. Orgasms are the release of built up blood (vasocongestion) in the clitoris and vaginal tissues along with a release of muscle tension (myotonia).   I say the “majority of orgasms” are caused by clitoral stimulation because some women are capable of “thinking themselves off,” or using a sexual fantasy alone to reach orgasm.  This is fairly rare, however.

For a long time people believed that the clitoris was only a small button of erectile tissue at the top of the vulva. However, today we know that the clitoris actually has 18 or more structures, some of which are readily visible, while others are not.  Although the clitoris is much smaller than the penis, it has twice the number of nerve endings (about 8,000) as the penis (about 4,000).  It has a higher concentration of nerve fibers than anywhere else on the body, including the tongue or fingertips!

My guess is that your partner’s head is in a different place during some sexual behaviors and this may affect her experience of orgasm.  Physiologically they are the same, but her emotional responses to them may vary.  In the end, who cares what causes them – if they feel good, do it.

Dr. Carroll’s Sex Advice #2

Q:  What does it mean when your partner says they want to “get you off”?

A:  They want to make you have an orgasm – either manually (with their hand), orally (with their mouth). or by body contact (grinding).

Dr. Carroll’s Sex Advice #1

Q:  I just started being sexually active with my boyfriend.  We’ve only been together for a month and we’ve had intercourse.  Is this wrong?  It still really hurts and I’m wondering if that is normal.  Finally, I still wonder if I should wait to have sex and I’m afraid I’m being a tease by telling my boyfriend I want to wait now.  He always convinces me to do it when I tell him I want to wait.  I don’t know if I’m doing it because of him pressuring me or if I’m doing it because I really want to.

A:  Only you can decide what is best for yourself.  While some people begin sexual relationships earlier than others, it really all depends on what you are comfortable with.  Typically your thoughts about when to become sexual in a relationship revolve around your own personal attitudes and values – and include your religious views, family (there is research that says that teens whose parents talked to them about sex wait longer), and cultural issues (societal expectations).  Religious men and women tend to be more conservative in the expression of their sexuality and it’s not unusual for people who are very religious to feel guilty about certain sexual behaviors (including becoming sexual too early in a relationship).

I personally believe that couples should wait for three things before a relationship becomes sexual.  First, there should be trust and honesty in the relationship.  Secondly, you should have good communication and hopefully a conversation about past sexual activity and possible sexually transmitted diseases.  Thirdly, you should not be pressured in any way, shape, or form.  Wanting to be sexual should be your decision, not something that is forced on you.  All of these things are important in the building of intimate relationships.

Sex can be painful the first couple of times and a woman might bleed a bit.  However, once you are comfortable and relaxed it shouldn’t hurt.  The fact you are unsure about why you are doing it makes me think your body isn’t ready.  If you are tense, the muscles in your vagina will also be tense, making intercourse painful.  I would talk to your boyfriend and tell him what you are thinking.  Maybe it would be best to step back and really figure out if you are ready.  Just because you’ve already started having sex doesn’t mean you have to continue.  You can stop until you’re feeling more comfortable about the decision.  He really shouldn’t be pressuring you into anything.  If he does, he’s not respecting your thoughts and concerns.  My guess is that you’re doing it only to make him happy and you’re not really convinced you want to be doing it.

In the end, however, it all comes down to the fact that decisions about sex and intimacy are deeply personal.  You can only decide what is right for you!

More Palm Beach Photos!

I really wanted to get these photos up earlier this week.  It seems like there is too much to do and too little time – isn’t that always the case?   So many of you have told me you’d like to see more  Carnal Knowledge blogs and I couldn’t agree more.  So there are some changes coming!  Starting today, we will have a new CK blog every week – with updates every Monday.  There’s just too much to say! Let me know if you have any suggestions or comments.  You can comment here or shoot me an email at drjanellcarroll@gmail.com.

I have lots more cool pictures from Palm Beach.  I will post them here and also on my Flickr page (see below on the right).  Hope you come back soon.